How to Work With Me?
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Published
This is a living document, and I try to update it when I learn or realize something new. I didn't want to create a dedicated page for it, at least not just yet, so I published it as a blog post.
About me
Hey, I'm Eeva-Jonna, but everyone knows me as Eevis. I'm not Eeva, but I often let it slide with non-Finnish speakers, and two-part names aren't that common elsewhere. But I'd love for you to use either Eevis or Eeva-Jonna, not Eeva.
I'm a non-binary woman, and my pronouns are they/she. In practice, it means that you can refer to me as 'she' (mostly, because I'd be correcting everyone all the time if I wasn't ok with 'she'), but I often refer to myself as 'they,' and I ask you to respect that. So if I write, for example, my bio with 'they', it's not a typo, and you don't need to fix it to 'she'.
I'm also autistic with a head injury, which means I process information differently than neurotypicals do. I try to explain some of these things in this document, but in general, please, don't make assumptions through a neurotypical lens about my behaviour or the way I'm thinking.
Lastly, I don't do well with injustice, or any sexist, homophobic, transphobic, ableist, or racist comments or behaviours. I will bring them up if I have spoons.
Working Hours
If I can choose my work hours without limitations when I'm part of a team, I work from about 7:30 to 15:30 Finnish time. Of course, I'm flexible if there are meetings or other things agreed, but these are my ideal working hours. For solo work, I usually start earlier.
I'm definitely a morning person, and I do my best cognitive work in the morning. Writing is one of the things I reserve for mornings, as I'm most productive at that time. I can code all day, but I usually solve the most challenging tasks in the mornings.
Communication Style
Written communication is most natural for me because it gives me time to think and formulate my thoughts. It also gives me time to process what the other person is telling me.
Meetings, where I need to react quickly and give responses, are not my cup of tea most of the time. If I happen to have a lot of energy, I might shine in those meetings, but that's like a maximum of 5 percent of the time. I'm often tired.
I'm Finnish, which brings another layer to communication differences, especially in a multicultural environment. Even our friendly communication is often perceived as too direct compared to, for example, the US communication style. We tend to skip the small talk and fillers more often and go to the topic faster. We are also more reserved, which can often be interpreted as unfriendliness, but I can assure you, it's not that.
Personally, I find small talk challenging, even though I've tried to learn how to do it. I don't always even notice that there is a time for it, and I tend to go straight to the point, especially if the point is something I'm excited about. So if this happens, it's not you, it's me.
And please, give me the honest opinion, situation, or prediction. For example, in a job interview, I appreciate a truthful explanation of the situation at the workplace, rather than some marketing lies. I really want to know what I'm committing to, even if it's something suboptimal. The same goes for anything else - be it a project or other commitment.
The Hard Conversations
When I bring up problems, I want to discuss them so that everyone gets heard, not just bring solutions. That often means that initially, I'm not providing solutions; I'm just describing the problem so that everyone knows what it's about and can start ideating.
I often have solution ideas in my mind, but I don't want them to have the anchor effect. Instead, I want to hear others' ideas as well. In certain kinds of environments, this might look like I'm just bringing up problems, not solutions.
Also, if I feel that the environment is not psychologically safe, for me, asking questions or help publicly is not easy, and it takes time to reach the point where I do it.
One example is asking for help with a coding problem in a public Slack channel. Assume I constantly read messages where others are being borderline rude, and framing it as "we just give direct feedback". In that case, it's not a psychologically safe environment for anyone, but especially for someone who has had to endure more or less belittling for their whole career. So, when I'm writing the question on that channel, I need to mentally prepare for those rude comments and check all the possible scenarios for my problem, instead of, you know, just writing the question. And that takes a lot of spoons to do that.
Meetings
I'm one of those people who don't enjoy meetings if there are too many of them in a day. Whether in-person or remote, I become exhausted after attending too many meetings in a day. I also need some time to transition from one meeting to another, so I can contribute my best in both meetings, especially if they're unrelated.
Meetings need to have an agenda. I need to know what I should be prepared for. If it's an informal coffee meeting, that's enough to know about it, but for meetings where something needs to be decided, I want to know beforehand what we're doing and what the goal of the meeting is.
If I'm in the middle of something, like solving a task or writing a document, asking me to just hop into a call is not a good idea if you want me to give my best in that meeting. So please, allow me at least 15 minutes to transition from my task if possible.
Information
When there is something new to understand, especially if it's a big concept or a whole new codebase, my approach for getting into it might seem chaotic. I'm trying to absorb as much as possible, and then start building the bigger picture, piece by piece.
So, the best way to give me information? Give me a summary, just enough to start working with, and let me ask questions, read the code or other materials, and absorb everything.
When given a lot of information, I often don't have questions right away. My brain needs a moment to build the connections before I can ask anything meaningful. So let me have some time, and then come back with questions.
Remote vs Office
When I come to the office, I can rarely concentrate there. So, office days are for human interaction, conversations, ideation, and other things that are easier in person.
I do my best software development work at home, with my own setup. So, if a deadline is approaching or something else requires my concentration, I would rather skip the office days to get things done.
The Things Often Misunderstood
I gather a lot of information, and I start seeing patterns even before I realise it myself. So, when I bring concerns up, it's not negativity for negativity's sake. It's me seeing risks and trying to address them early on, rather than having these "Oh, things went badly wrong"-meetings after the s*ht hits the fan. Trust me, I've been in many such meetings, after I've warned that the exact thing could happen. But my bringing up the risks is often misunderstood as pure negativity and resistance to change.
When I'm Dealing with Stress
When I'm dealing with stress, I usually withdraw. I avoid coming to the office because I want to avoid any conflicts. I'm also likely to be sleeping poorly, so it takes a lot more from my social battery to meet with people, and this way, I'm trying to preserve my energy.
The Things I Struggle With
If things are too hazy, and I don't even know who to ask for clarifications, I might struggle. And this is not really about the technical details. It's about structure and understanding people and what they expect.
In these cases, I don't expect anyone to solve the issues for me. In the short term, I usually just need a nudge to find the relevant information to solve the problem at hand. If it's a project, then I will need to understand the bigger picture and expectations to thrive. But if the project is a constant mess with constantly changing or not clear expectations, it is super hard for me, and I most likely burn out trying to exceed those unknown expectations.
Feedback
If you want to give me some constructive feedback, please allow me space to react to it. I usually don't do well with it initially, and I need some time to process it. I am taking the relevant parts out of it, I promise, but I need time to get on terms with it. Rejection sensitivity is a real thing, folks.
For positive feedback, it might seem that I don't react to it. I'm learning to say thanks, but other times, I might just smile, and that's it. It doesn't mean I don't appreciate it - it's just that I haven't learned how to react to it.
I appreciate truthful feedback, so if there is nothing to say, then don't say anything. I won't, so if I give some (especially positive) feedback, you know I really mean it.
Wrapping Up
Overall, behind most of these things, there's the need to understand the "why" before I can actually do my best work. Sometimes it's about the technical decisions, but very often, it's about people's motives. If I struggle to understand the why, I often struggle to complete the task at hand, because I don't have all the necessary information.